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Tuesday, February 4, 2020

Note to self.

At 60 I dont care anymore about almost everything.
I just want to be me.
I dont have to impress others just to be lovable.
Love me for what I am and thats it.
Take it or leave it.
I have my days, the ups n downs in life.
Sometimes I am ok, sometimes I am not.
Sometimes I am happy and there were days when I feel washed n drained.
Thanks to God, I manage to stand tall to this day.
I am in my world n I rule my world.
No body is going to tell me how to step forward.
Its my choice and  if Allah decides not to fullfill my dreams
than I am totally in His mercy..Allah knows best.
I am sick and tired of trying to please people.
Tired of always putting others first than only me.
Tired of being manupulated and used.
I am too old for games.
I' ve been thru a lot and have been there and done that.
Nothing matters anymore.
I have loved and I hv lost.
I have been hurt much more than I can say.
I have been let down, ignored and forgotten.
Failures are part of what I am today.
For 60 years I have been trying to fit in..
Trying hard to be notice by those that I love
 I accept the facts that I win some and loose some.
That is life. My life.
Till the last breath which is not so far away, I just want to say....
Please, my life is hard enough already so please please God,
let me be happy.
Let me be me.
Only God knows n understands.
Allah hu Akhbar.

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